THE JAMES RIVER IS DELICIOUS

6:40 am
Sept. 12, 2010
Jamestown Beach, Williamsburg Virginia

I am mentally preparing myself for the big event. Please notice the only tattoo is my number 172. I should have done the others, especially the Iron Man one to psych out my competition. I think they seemed pretty scared of me however when they see my huge muscles.

7:05 am
Sept. 12, 2010
James River, Williamsburg Virginia

I am trying to beat the pack into the water. Once there, I realize how stinking hard it is to swim in murky brown water, no sunlight, with foggy goggles. Oh, and every time I try to breathe on the left, my strong side, I inhale another pint of the James River. And oh, is it yummy.

7:20 am ish..
Sept. 12, 2010
Transition area, Virginia

I decide that running in a wetsuit is actually terrible. Please note the old men walking that appear to be moving faster then me. But Whit is standing there looking cute so I smile, sort of and keep running, hoping my legs won't collapse. Praise God, they don't.

7:23 am ish
Sept. 12, 2010

Route 5, Williamsburg Virginia

My bike and I are ready to go... REALLY ready to go - and so we are off for 12 miles which was actually kind of fun. I liked the bike part. I really liked the bike part, surprisingly. I was worried my outfit was not covering what it was supposed to, but apparently no one was offended so the ride went well.

8:00am ish
Sept. 12, 2010
Some greenway - Williamsburg, Virginia

I am off the bike , ready to run! My goal was 1:45 minutes. If I can run my 3.2 miles in under 30 minutes, I will beat my goal by 15 minutes and finish in 1hour 30 minutes. For me, a decent time.

8:35 am
Sept. 12, 2010
Random parking lot near transition area, Virginia

I race the 5k in less than 29 minutes - and so I finished in 1 hour, 30 minutes and 13 seconds. A new world record. Ok, that's a lie.

But I did have fun, felt strong, and enjoyed the whole process.

I also wanted to thank my friends and family that said prayers, read my silly blogs, sent encouraging notes and emails - and asked me how the training was going.

It was a fun process. Although I am walking with a slight limp today, I will likely do one of these again - and won't bore you all with the details. I do however, appreciate your encouragement and kindness. It meant more than I can say.

In the end - my first TRI was great fun! Thanks for joining me. And thanks to this guy, who wasn't rude when he passed me right before the finish line.

1 WEEK COUNTDOWN AND UPDATE: AVOID PUKE

In 7 days I will be back at work with sore legs and my brief brush with athletic greatness will be over.

In the meanwhile, I have much to do. No really. Its going to be a very busy week.

1. Call and speak harshly to wet suit company who apparently thought my order was for year 2013 or beyond since it has not arrived yet.

2. Run 5 k this morning and avoid the pukers. Perhaps you recall my earlier run in with Roanokers who jog and puke at the same time in the early summer. Anyway, in 1 hour or more from now, I will run the first annual Roanoke Donut Dash where people (not me) run 2 miles, eat 1 dozen donuts, then run 2 more miles. I will be running but not eating, or puking. I hope. I intend to get out ahead of the pack on the way back for obvious reasons. Elected not to bring the dogs, also for reasons I need not explain.

3. Shave so I look like a real athlete by next week, not just some lumpy 31 year old who saw her husband do a triathlon last spring and said "Hey, I can do that, hee hee hee."

4. Begin work on temporary tattoo that says Kona 2009. You see, Kona is where the real Iron Man competition is and I really want all the nice people in Williamsburg next week to think I am awesome so a wee bit of fake body art may be just the ticket. I am also hoping to paint muscles on my stomach and arms. Will keep you posted.

5. Swim today if our pool is open - federal holiday and all.

6.  Ride my bike tomorrow.

7. Swim again on Wednesday.

8. Ride again on Thursday. Perfect the grimace face while on bike so it looks like I am working really really hard while peddling. Also learn to ride with awesome sippy cup husband installed on bike last night so I can have water without having to move my face from the grimace position.

9. Travel to Williamsburg - buy tricorn hat and fake musket to fit in with locals.

10. Eat pasta for 5 days (actually, I think this is the most important element of the race taper)

11. Put all of stuff including lets hope and pray a wetsuit, in a bucket so I can change during this crazy little race. I would hate to have to bike in the wetsuit or run in bike shoes so bringing all the right gear may be important.

12. Pay photographers to keep pictures of the event off the interwebs.

It will be a busy week, which I hope starts by avoiding throw up this morning and ends by avoiding throw up next Sunday. Will keep you posted as the countdown begins.

B.R.I.C. WORK OUT - WHAT?

People who train for triathlons know what BRIC work outs are. Since you can't really call what I have been doing "training," it stands to reason that I have no idea what BRIC or BRICK stands for. I simply know the lingo and that with two weeks left before this race, I should be doing lots of BRIC/K workouts.

Practically, it means doing a bike and run back to back to prepare your legs for the state which they will endure during the actual race.

But when it comes to understanding the acronym, and what it stands for, I am at a total loss. My best guesses are as follows:

BIKE
RUN
IN
CONCRETE

BEAT
RATS
IN
COMPETITION

BIKE
RACE
IN
CANADA

BEAT
RAMBLERS
IN
CONSTANT
KICKING

See the problem I am having here? So when I attempted to preform this feat on Saturday, bike 11-12 miles then run 3 miles, I felt saddened by my stupidity. No, not by the throbbing pain in my knee, the numbness in my hands, or the soreness of my legs, my ignorance made me sad. So this morning, I resolved to be ignorant no longer and so I googled the term.

And the good news is it doens't really stand for anything according to some guy on the interwebs who is in Minnesota racing and writing about triathlons. He seems to know what he is talking about and according to the guy, Brick means:

Some think its origin come from “B”ike and “R”un. Others say the term “brick” only accurately reflects what your legs feel like when you jump off the bike and start running. Still others say the term comes from New Zealand triathlete Mike Brick who perhaps coined the term when he started doing the regimen.

Ok. So it doesn't mean anything. It means I have 13 days to get my tail in gear - my tush in the water and my legs on a bike or run.

It means no more lollygagging.

It means I have to buckle down and get to work.

It means I need more cliches to describe an increased intensity in training.

Encouraging speeches, bribes and other tokens are welcome. If you see my running around Roanoke wearing a bathing suit, yes, a bathingsuit, don't stare or laugh, please. Just ignore me and let me brick in peace.

THIS TRIATHLON TRAINING MAY KILL ME

Now, if you know me, you are aware that I tend to exaggerate sometimes. Whit, no comment. But occasionally something so scary will happen that I have no need to embellish the story - because it speaks for itself.

Like last night.

My puppies and I (pictured here) went for a run. We all needed some exercise and while it was late, I considered my dogs to be good protectors.

We ran from our house to the Roanoke City / Roanoke River Greenway, and headed West. I had planned on a 3 mile run, nothing crazy.

Atticus and Gracie were having a great time - prancing, saying hello to others, trotting in front of me on their leashes...

Around mile 1, we were going down to an area of the Greenway that often gets flooded during heavy rains when the Roanoke River swells... I was watching the puddles to make sure the Dogs were not stepping in any too deep, when all of a sudden, about 6 feet ahead of me I saw this:

NO KIDDING.

I saw what I am quite sure was the biggest copperhead I had ever seen in my life. His head was so big, it was the width of my cellphone. His body was fat in places, but he had a skinny tail - no rattle.

Thankfully, he was heading away from us at the time and my dogs, thank God, did not see him at all. Had Gracie seen the moving snake, I have no doubt she would have gotten close to say hello and make friends. She has attempted this with squirrels, possums, etc.

When I saw how close the dogs were to the snake's tail - I freaked out, screamed, pulled them back and headed in the other way. Thankfully, by the time the snake's head turned toward us, we were long gone - FAST...

For starters, I am so grateful the dogs did not see the snake first. I cannot imagine any scenario where that would have worked out well.

Secondly, I want you all to know that I am a faster runner then I ever realized, I just have to have a huge 2-3 foot snake within striking distance from my dogs to reach optimum race speed.

And last, I would like to say that really really really hate snakes, and I hope I don't see that one, or any other one for the rest of my life. I am still kind of scared and keep looking at the rug in my office. YIKES.

LIKE I NEED MORE STUFF

The crazy thing about triathlons, is that you have to have a lot of stuff... and frankly, as of late, I have been kind of anti-stuff.

For example, I try to take a pile of stuff to the Rescue Mission or place in a pile for our church yard sale in October. This purging of stuff has been occurring weekly in the Ellerman house because we are increasingly aware how little we actually need.

BUT - if I want to safely complete this race, event, whatever you want to call it in 3.5 weeks, I need stuff.

• I need a bike. Check. Had that for years.
• Bike shoes. Check. Again, been collecting dust in our basement and are glad to be in use.
• Running shoes. Check - although I may need a new pair and will go to my local running store this week and ask.
• Bathing suit and/or Tri-athlon suit. Now, I have bathing suits, but not one I could run and bike in (hello - chaffing) so I had to buy a new one. I considered the whole "tri-suit" thing but my body is just not built to wear a flimsy unitard in public. It's not. I promise. So, I now own a new suit, and a top to wear over the suit for running and biking so I can hide snacks in the pockets, and well, hide the body that is not built for a unitard.
• Wetsuit. I really think this is unnecessary but the people who claim to know these things, recommend one... and so last night I tried one on. Apparently, it was designed for barbie. No, not a woman who looks like Barbie, the plastic doll. It was teeny tiny. My ankles fit, but everything north of my knees remained uncovered. Ugh. so now I have to rent a wetsuit to wear.

Oh, and while we are discussing perfectly terrible images like me trying on a wetsuit at 10pm in my new bathing suit in my living room with cats and dogs watching in amazement, I would like for you to picture my workout last night.

Imagine my basement, typical unfinished basement. A bike on a stationary trainer. Me in my new bathing suit and shirt, bike shoes, socks, sitting on said trainer sweating like I am in a sauna, trying to peddle. How can a machine that is perfectly still, be so painful to ride? How can a bike that is not actually going anywhere, make my heart rate go through the roof? How can I still be so sucky at bike riding after 4 months?

Apparently, I haven't been doing it enough... and that is why the bike and trainer won last night, and I stumbled off in an exhausted defeated state.

So from now on, every night - 30 minutes on the trainer. At least maybe by the end of this I will suck less and be able to ride in this event. And, maybe, it is slightly less embarrassing to be riding a bike in your basement in a bathing suit and clip shoes, then it is to be wearing a wetsuit in your living room.

AWESOME RUN

There used to be a waiter at a restaurant here in Roanoke that would always respond to your order, by saying "Awesome."

Did he really think me ordering a Millet Burger was awesome? Did my order or the way I expressed it, inspire awe in this perky guy? I doubt it but the word is used in lieu of many other expressions these days, like Great, or Outstanding. I however, will attempt to use it in this blog, as it was originally intended.

I went for an awesome run on Sunday. No, my performance did not inspire awe, nor my ability. It was where the run took place that was awesome.

3300 feet above sea level, on a gravel road, atop a mountain due west of my home, Potts Mountain. The temperature on Potts Mountain is usually 10-15 degrees cooler than the temp. down here in the valley. So please, if you will, imagine a cool 73 degree morning, bright blue sky, isolated gravel road, with the most beautiful lush green trees, wildflowers and rock formations on either side. Imagine with me, the quiet that exists in such a place with no cars, no airplanes, no sounds but for my feet hitting the gravel in rhythm, and the occasional buzz of a bee flying by my head in curiosity.

My running companion was a lovely purple butterfly. It flew beside me, in front of me, occasionally landing on the grey gravel a few yards ahead. Perhaps my bright red running shirt and pink shorts were as shocking to him, as his bright purple wings were to me. Either way, we ran/flew together for 40 minutes, quietly watching one another moving forward with purpose.

His home, apparently, is one where black eyed susans, daisies and Queen Ann's lace grows naturally at the road's edge. Mine is typically one where cigarette butts and trash are found in the same location. His is one where the day is defined by the location of the sun, and mine where the day is often defined by an alarm, or calender warning sent by email.

It was an awesome run because I finished encouraged, excited, oddly rejuvenated. So hopefully before this whole triathlon is done in 1 month (from tomorrow) I will get to go back and run with my new friend. And thanks to a great website on Virginia butterflies, I now know his name: Limenitis arthemis astyanax. I will call him AL for short.

FLAT. AGAIN

I took vacation last week. Not from training, I mean, who would ever want to take vacay from biking and swimming and running? Not me, I assure you. No way.

I took vacation from my vacuum. My job. Email. My cell phone - and I went to the beach with my hubbie's people. Very nice people by the way.

We stayed on an island with flat long roads and bike paths. You see where I am going, right? Lots of extra time to train for this great event which will take place in a little over 4 weeks.

Day 1 - Biked 32 miles. Flat Tire at Mile 26. Not awesome. Husband kindly fixed flat and we went home.

Day 2 - Biked 8 miles - ran 1 mile. This was a poor attempt at a BRIC work out.

Day 3 - Ran 4.2 miles - it was hot and gross and not pleasant. Hated every step of it.

Day 4 - Biked 31 miles. Flat on Mile 28. Hubby / mechanic was no where in sight so I started to walk. Walked 1 mile, and mechanic arrived. He had been on a longer ride and thankfully not passed me yet on the way home. Fixed flat. Rode home.

Day 5 - Ran a few miles - not too terrible.

Day 6 - did nothing. Best day of all.

Day 7 - came home, strapped bike to the top of the car - and wouldn't you know it, Tire was FLAT by the time we got home.

The good news is maybe I am not to blame for all the flats. Afterall, if air can do it, my bum, weight and legs can't be totally to blame? Can they?

Have 4 plus weeks to figure out my equipment problem - because lets be frank about this. Am I really gonna stop and change a tire mid Triathlon? No way. I will just stop - leave my bike and hobble back to base with my bike shoes on, ask for snacks and call it a day.

Now, that would be a bad ending to months and months of work.

So, I will speak to my mechanic (ie - husband) and hopefully no more flats. But just in case, I will watch this handy dandy how to video on the interwebs - complete with how to change a flat advice.

WHAT GOES AROUND - COMES AROUND

I generally believe this to be a true statement. Call it what you will, but I often think the world does not reward terrible acts.

So I wondered yesterday, when I arrived at the local pool for my training, what I had done to mankind? I wondered this when I found a new floater in the outdoor swim lane at my local pool.

Please imagine with me, if you can, an older gentlemen, maybe early 70's, khaki babeball hat on his head, large blue noodle between his legs and under his back as a floatation device, black speedo, floating back and forth in lane 2 of 2 lanes. Cute kids getting lessons in lane 1, and the "open swim" area empty.

"HA" I say to myself. Been down this road and don't want to do it again. I will ask the lifeguard whether it is more appropriate for man and noodle to leave the lane so I can use it... I have a swim cap on. I plan on getting my face in the water. I mean business.

Life guard, clearly not interested or sympathetic to my concern, cooly says "you can ask him if you want - but he just got there."

Not helpful young man. Not helpful at all.

Well, I don't have the guts to ask Senor speedo to move, or share, so I sheepishly swam in the open swim part, dodging small children who eventually decided swimming underneath me and in front of me was a fun game.

Again, tried to splash the noodle guy - to no avail. That must be why he brought the hat.

So what have I done to hurt the world? Did I kill too many bugs this week? Was I unkind to a stranger who called our office?

I am repentant. I am sorry. I am hopeful for brighter days and fewer men floating mid-lane. I will run tonight, and send blessings to those I pass. Perhaps I can make amends - and things will get better. Perhaps the greenways will be less crowded with people standing or walking at a snails pace mid lane.

TWO- A- DAY

When my brother was in High School in Tampa Florida (think hot, very hot), he had a week or two in mid-August where they had football practice, twice a day.

People threw up.
People ate spaghetti.
People threw up again.
People were miserable.
My brother quit football.


So when the triathlon book left by the triathlon fairy in our bathroom, suggested I start working out twice a day, starting like now, I decided it was a terrible idea.

Some people have to take medicine twice a day.

Some people watch Law & Order re runs twice a day.

I imagine some folks eat chips and salsa twice a day (YUM!)

But seriously. Work out twice a day? If we ever had to do that in my athletic past I have blocked it out as a painful memory.

But maybe the book is right. Since technically the race is 3 workouts in one day, in a row, without chips and salsa, perhaps I should do that.

So I will start, some combination of the following every week - which, by the sheer numbers, means more than 1 in a day:

Long run
Hard run
easy run
long swim
easy swim
Long Bike
bike / run - BRIC
easy bike

Yuck. I already don't love this - but like eating your vegetables and taking vitamins, it'll be good for me.

Will report of any throwing up or quitting that occurs. Will also report if spaghetti is involved because I like to eat.

7 weeks to go!

I THINK I CAN, I THINK I CAN

When I look at a bridge or hill on foot or bike, I feel like the little engine that could.... "I think I can I think I can," I will whisper to myself. "I can run over this thing without walking. I can bike up this mountain. I can I can."

For the last few weeks, these challenges have thankfully become easier. Apparently your body can become stronger, your lungs more capable of aerobic exercise etc. So when I read in a Women's triathlon book yesterday that I needed to set an intention for my race, a goal, I became despondent.

My goal, Duh ( I revert to 4th grade vocabulary when despondent), is to finish this thing without walking. Isn't that enough?

Maybe it is... but maybe, I could do more.  Maybe I could actually enjoy this whole process. Maybe I could learn to like running and biking. Maybe swimming could again become a place to rest my mind and worries.

I ran 4.2 miles yesterday.
I saw a lovely Indian man in a crown.
I killed three bugs with my left eye.
I felt strong and able to run longer.
I smiled at people on the greenway.
I counted 7 trains filed with coal sitting in Roanoke.
I saw three lovely pregnant ladies exercising.
It took over 45 minutes.
I actually had fun.

Today (weather permitting) I will bike or swim outside. I will do my best not to complain, but to enjoy the new found strength in my legs and arms. I will enjoy pushing my body to new limits, and try to be gracious when it resists.

Yesterday was the 8 week mark - 2 months until race day. Can I keep training, gaining strength and enjoy this process?

"I think I can, I think I can."

SUNRISE....

For any of your high school theater nerds like me (and I know a few of you are out there), what do you think of when I say "SUNRISE?"

I hope you think of "SUNSET." After all, we have all either been in or enjoyed more than one performance of Fiddler on the Roof.

That being said (and here is a link to a classic version of the song
)

I will no longer think of Sunrise... and Sunset.

I will think of SUNRISE - and snot.

A lesson learned today:

When one rides their bike shortly after the sun is up, and one is not used to such activity and that hour, or the speed of a bike when the weather is cool, snot happens.

Alot of it. It's gross. And I think, that is why bike gloves are recommended and used by professionals.

I also think I should have been prepared for this but sadly wa snot. Get it?

Even in the pool there are ways to gracefully take care of the "snot issue."
Runners also have their ways. But Bikers? How do they do it.

You sort of need your hands on the bike... and sudden head movements, jerks etc., are not encouraged. So how does one truly handle the issue?

I needed advice so I looked online, duh. And I am NOT, I repeat, NOT the first person to have this problem. There are blogs and blogs written about it. Numerous bits of helpful advice.

My favorite, written by FatCyclist.com, even calculates the amount of snot produced over his lifetime of riding. He, by the way, uses the glove and wipe on the shorts technique.

I am looking into alternatives, but for now think I need to get something to wear around my neck, like a little cloth I can use to help... or wipe the tears away when my legs burn so much I can't peddle any more.

I realize the easiest solution would be to not ride at sunrise, but basically that means I wouldn't be riding at all and that makes for bad training when over 2/3 of this competition will be spent on a bike.

So, back to work. I will keep you posted on my research and riding and let you know how the snot issue turns out.

AHH, IT'S GOING

Some lovely friends have asked me how my training is going. These people are kind, and they mean well. They may actually care about my training and or athletic prowess, although for the most part I think they are just being thoughtful.

My pat response has been "Ahh, its going." What this really means is I am running, biking and swimming when I can, but it's not the highlight of my life.

Henri  Nouwen is actually the current highlight of my life but alas I will save my love for Henri for another day. (Henri is pictured here for fun).

Swimming is good. But for the Division I Varsity swimmer who beat my tail back and forth at the RAC pool last week, I have felt strong and confident in the water. I have also enjoyed swimming more than I have in years which to me is a great blessing.

Biking has been fine. I have yet to face plant and I have decided the biking shorts with room for two may not be a great fit, so I am in the market for shorts that only have room for one person. This is a good start on the bike I think.

The real hard part has been running. I have been jogging, and jogging and jogging more, yet I am still terrible at it. It's hot out, my legs feel heavy and I generally count down the minutes until I am at home sipping something cold. That was until last night. Last night I went for a late jog - goal, 32 minutes or around 3.2 miles.

According to http://www.mapmyrun.com/ - it wasn't actually a 3.2 miler - more like a 3 miler, but it didn't hurt and I only looked at my watch once. This friends, is a mini miracle. For the first time in years, I ran and didn't hate every step.

I came home excited, almost thrilled. I told Whit the run was so not bad, so surprisingly not terrible, it was almost fun.

So ask me today how the training is going and I won't say "Ahh, its going." I will say - "It's going well, thank you" and I will maintain this sentiment until the next time I go for a jog and hate every minute.

OUCH MY HAMMIES HURT

So I have been trying to run bike and swim blah blah blah like the books say... a few runs, swims and 1 hour with my bum on a plastic seat a week.

And so far I am seeing great results.

Like new bruises are beginning to form on my legs... and it hurts to walk up stairs... and chain grease is permanently affixed to my knees...and I have to do more laundry.... and there is one new
development which made me turn to the interwebs in search of answers.

My hamstrings hurt. Both of them with equal intensity. They have hurt for a few days now and so I am wondering, why do they hurt?

Was it the 10 miles I ran on Saturday? Or the ride up Mill Mountain and to Floyd and back today that did it? But for the fact I did neither of those things this weekend, I think the cause really might be lack of encouragement. You know - after years of mild use I now expect great things from these muscles and yet I have not been as kind or encouraging as I should be.

The websites I found however, say nothing about encouraging words and hamstring pain.

This one website I came across says

Here are a number of factors that can lead to a hamstring tear.

• Previous hamstring injury
• Lack of hamstring flexibility
• Lack of hamstring strength
• Imbalance between hamstrings and quadriceps
• Imbalance between the left and right hamstrings
• Anterior pelvic tilt
• Hypomobile lumbar spine
• Muscle fatigue
• Dehydration
• Electrolyte depletion

Wow. I don't even know what most of those words mean and I am pretty sure my pelvis is not titled, so there must be a more basic reason. I really think I need to give my hammies some r&r, say nice things and they will be back in business.

So I googled "encouraging your hamstrings." No seriously.

And all I found were websites trying to sell me stuff like gel and freezy packs and ultrasound stuff. So I kept looking. One smart looking website says my hammie pain could be related to overuse or "pushing beyond your limits."

OMG. How did the website know that?

Amazing how the Internet has developed into an all knowing enterprise. I did push myself beyond my limits this week and now need to be a wee bit more careful.

Today is a rest day, but tomorrow I will be back on the saddle, or speedo, or something. Until then I am saying nice things to my leg muscles, encouraging and positive words and words of thanks. "Doing great guys - keep it up. You can do it."

I'll keep you posted but so far I think the nice words are going far.

LET'S DO THE NUMBERS - WEEK 1

Don't you just love NPR? I do. Do you know the show MarketPlace, a great show on economics from American Public Media? Before they give you the good or bad news on the day's various markets, they warn you by saying, "Let's Do the Numbers."

Well, here are my scary numbers.

Swim so far this week: 45 minutes
Still need to swim: 15 minutes

Run so far this week: 2.62 + 2.98  = 5.6 miles
Still need to run: 3.4 miles by Sat. Night
(and no, I sadly don't think my fun walk on Sat. morning to benefit RAM HOUSE in Roanoke counts - although I do encourage your attendance, for a great cause, and your online registration at http://www.roanokeareaministries.org/)

Bike so far this week: 0 miles.

No really, I haven't even found my helmet yet... That will hopefully occur Sunday - which means no biking on week 1.

So why do I share all this?
Because the numbers say alot . They say I need to exercise today and tomorrow and Saturday. They say "get your tail in gear Ellerman - less typing, more running."
They say I need to focus on what matters - a 2 hour race in September.
They also say, don't do the numbers any more, they seem too scary.

MAP MY FUN RUN

After the "I told you so" incident with my husband over the weekend, I decided I needed a triathlon plan. (read the Mule post if you were not unaware of my stubborn issues).

Why do I need a plan?

Because even lolly gaggers need to do the miles.... There I said it. I can't do this triathlon thing without training my body to swim, bike and run.

For now, I have set my training plan to be pretty general:
1 hour in the pool a week
10 miles running a week
20 miles on the bike (yes, a week)

Tonight I went for another fun run. I refuse to call it a run because statistically speaking, I wasn't running. According to Mapmyrun.com (which by the way is a great website) I ran 2.73 miles. According to my Mother's stove, I was out for 30 minutes.

That's not very fast, thus the fun run title.

Again, my attempt to do math is pretty awful: 2.73 / 30 = 1/n .... So N, means I was running almost 11 min. miles. Wow. That might be a new speed record for slowest run of all times. I am pretty sure there were nursing home patients in the ER I passed walking faster. I saw at least one woman who was probably 8 months pregnant, pushing 2 kids in a stroller, jogging at a better pace that I was.

So while I felt good about my attempt at running 3 miles, and proud that I did not need to stop or ask to borrow the 2L of O2 the nursing home patient in the ER was pulling behind him, I have a room for improvement.

I also need to run 7.23 more miles this week... and walk my Dogs, bike 20 miles, clean my house, argue stuff for clients, wear a suit to work, swim for another 20 minutes and clean the hair out of my bathroom drain.

It could be a busy week. If my hip and knee get their way, I may also be going to buy new running shoes. Ok, I meant fun run shoes.

Until then, I may email that pregnant lady and ask if she wants to race. I could maybe take her if she goes into labor.

WHAT ME STUBBORN? YOU HAVE THE WRONG MULE.

It's true. I am stubborn, about many things. Oh, and I don't like being told what to do. These facts will come as no surprise to those who know me well.

So when my beloved husband suggested I look into a triathlon training schedule, and even offered to design one for me, I said "Thank you."

Please note, I did not agree to a training schedule. I did not agree that I even needed one. I actually avoided the subject all together and politely changed the subject.

"Thank you," was my way of saying, "butt out," or "didn't you read my article Whit? I am not intense like you and don't want to do this your way. I want to lolly gag my way into a sprint triathlon."

Apparently my husband knew what my thank you meant when hours later he graciously said "I know you don't want to make this event a bid deal, but its not like a fun run (ok, so he didn't say fun run) you will need to do some planning on your workouts."

He may know what he is talking about as he has finished 2 triathlons in the last 4 months - 1 sprint and 1 Olympic distance. And, even if he wasn't speaking from experience, I am pretty sure he is right.

I haven't admitted that fact to him yet, but I can't just lolly gag my way into a 20 mile race. I may have to do some planning.

Ok, so here is the plan.

Swim for 1 hour each week. This can be divided into 2 30 minute swims, or 1 1 hr. swim. Yesterday I swam for 45 minutes, so this week I need to get back to the pool at least once more.

And I need to run no less than 10 miles a week. For me that means 3-4 runs.

Oh, and biking. When my mechanic finishes my bike, I need to commit to 20 miles a week on the bike.

Perhaps my plan is too general. I may need to be more specific, but like most mules, I am unwilling to go all the way until I know there is a purpose.

So dearest husband, I admit you were right. I need a plan. "Thank you."

Love, Lauren

GROSS GENERALIZATION CONCERNING VW OWNERS

I would like to share a gross generalization about men and women who drive Volkswagens.

VW Drivers are the nicest people in the world. 

They are probably more likely to brake for animals, be kind to small children, and pray for world peace. I would venture to say they have less sadness in their lives, and more of them were named "Nicest person in the class" in High School.

I have no actual statistics to support these conclusions, simply my personal experience this morning.

While trying to jog (and move beyond my terrible Fun Run experience of last week) around my neighborhood, I was passed by a VW golf. The car was light grey, no stickers, nondescript.

As I huffed and puffed up an incline a few blocks from home, I saw the VW driver extend his left thumb out of the driver side window.

"Thumbs up. Great job, well done," his thumb was saying. "Don't stop now - you are almost there, keep jogging. You can do it."

See, I told you VW owners were the nicest people in the world. I saw friends and acquaintances pass my pathetic form all morning, and they made no attempt at encouragement. I am quite sure they either did not recognize me, or did and were too embarrassed to admit it.

But my new friend, the left thumb on the white guy driving the grey VW golf, to you, I say thank you.

I ran for 23 minutes straight this morning, and right around the time you showed up, I was tempted to stop and walk.

I hope to hit the road on Thursday morning. Are you free? Perhaps you could drive along near by with an encouraging wave or a simple extended thumb.

29 MINUTE MORNING "FUN RUN"

When a race advertises itself as a "fun run," it generally means that runners are welcome, but most folks will be walking, or jogging and walking. It is basically code for "serious runners may not want to participate."

I know this because I have participated in many a fun run. I like fun runs because people jog, stop, snack, chat, walk and jog some more. Dogs and babies are welcome. People chat and exchange pleasantries. That's my kind of cardio, the kind where snacking and talking are welcome.

This morning however, it was my plan to start triathlon training in my running shoes with a bang. Ok, so bang is a strong word. It was my goal to at least JOG for 30 minutes straight.

Allow me to share how my morning exercise went instead.

7:32 am    
Said goodbye to cute droopy ear dogs and headed out front door, ipod in hand, cute blue running outfit ready to go.

7:32 am   
I pod shuffle started Stop and Stare - One Republic. 3 minutes and 42 seconds of soft music with  a decent beat. I felt pretty good - running down hill, across parking lots of numerous churches, toward the Roanoke River Greenway.

7:37 am